I guess you could call me cynical from time to time but I think it’s within reason. Lately I have been getting really sick of mainstream radio hits. Sure I like dancing to them at the club and enjoy hearing a new hit for the first time but when I am bombarded with the same top 40 hits on a daily basis I get annoyed. I think it’s time to expand my musical horizons and start listening to the radio less.
Here are my picks for the 5 Worst Songs going into the summer.
They are listed from best to worst if you can believe it.
5) Jordin Sparks featuring Chris Brown- No Air- First things first, let me clarify something for you Jordin Sparks…you certainly cannot breathe without air. Good point Jordan. For those of you that don’t know the song she asks, “Tell me how I’m supposed to breathe with no air…” Well.. beats me because it turns out we need air to live. Quite a valid point. I’m sure she means it more figuratively than literally but frankly I’m sick of listening to whiny I’m so into you but you’re not into me love songs. Is that what the song is about?? I’m a jerk. I was also disappointed that my main man Chris Brown collaborated on this song because he’s so talented and shouldn’t stoop so low as to sing with a former American Idol that is sure to head back into the woodwork when her 5 minutes of fame are up. I don’t think she’s got the lasting power to make it like Kelly Clarkson did and is sure to become America’s next Rubben Studdard. Anyone remember the song I’m Sorry 2004. Didn’t think so. At least Rubben apologized for sucking so bad.
4) 4 Minutes- Madonna ft. JT- Like I mentioned in my introduction, I do enjoy dancing to songs like this in the club and did enjoy hearing it for the first time but I’m pretty much over it now. No but seriously Madonna, if we only have 4 minutes to save the world than why do you insist on wearing fur and driving around in an Escalade? Make no mistake, Madonna is a musical legend and I admire her endurance in the music world and ability to constantly re-invent herself but she is somewhat of a phony. She enjoys playing the role of the green celeb, always willing to lend a helping hand but I think it’s all just a publicity stunt. This song needs to stop being played.
3) Mariah Carey- Touch my body. Mariah nobody wants to touch your body except for those who want your money. You should really head back to the days when you were all cute and innocent and sang songs like Dreamlover and Fantasy. I agree she is a talented artist but I don’t particularly enjoy this tune, especially the part where she says, “I will hunt you down.” Fellas, is that not a huge turn-off when your Stitches clad woman is threatening to hunt you down if you run away from her? Get the hint woman. She should have stopped her career after Glitter.
2) Teardrops on my Guitar- by I don’t even know who because I hate country. So I don’t like country but for some reason I always seem to switch onto this song. It makes me feel ill. I don’t think that he’s the reason for the teardrops on your guitar, I think you are you big crybaby. Stop crying and start playing better music. That’s all I got on that one.
1) Annnnnnnnd the winner for most annoying and hated song going into the summer is………
LEONA LEWIS- Bleeding Love. UGHHHHHH! Can I just ask what it means to bleed love? Okay okay I get it Leona… you’re just so in love but your lyric choices make me feel sick. I sure hope you’re going to clean up that mess after you’re done bleeding your love all over the place. Whenever I hear this song I cringe. Does anyone out there like this song? I guess so since it’s been at the top of the charts for quite some time now. I challenge anyone who loves this song to post on my wall and let me know why you enjoy listening to songs regarding “love bleeders”.
That’s enough cynicism and loathing for now. Stay tuned because I’ll bring my happy go-lucky self back to let you know of some hits I actually enjoy. You might not even be aware of these artists yet so you might just go home with some new hits. Don’t ya just love getting new music? I’m like a kid on Christmas morning with that stuff.
Secrest out…I mean Leeran out.
For your number four pick, you forgot to mention Timbaland’s name to the song. He starts the song off plus he also produced it.
Number five No Air is a good song, why do you hate it?
As for Touch My Body, there is a sick remix to it featuring The-Dream and Rick Ross.
I agree with you on Teardrops on my Guitar and Bleeding Love though.
Dear Loathing Leeran (some alliteration for your sarcastic ass.)
We all just sat after Wednesday night dinner and read through your blog and were somewhat troubled and traumatized by the fact that you hate bleeding in love. On the whole, we have to agree with the rest of your comments, however, how you can so quickly dismiss a song that is clearly a musical masterpiece.
Here are some reasons why we LOVE Leona.
#1: Because even Lex can sing along with it. If you were present at last Saturday’s pre-drink a la singstar, you would know that this is a big deal.
#2: You can belt it out loud on your long commute to Brantford for work
#3: Bleeding love isn’t all that messy
#4:Because it has a really sick 80’s style beat to it. This is quite surprising that you hate it so much when you’re so in love with the 80s
#5: Even Kevin Pennant (my boss) likes this song. If a cool black dude can like it, so can you sista.
Alright. There you have it. Those are our reasons for loving Leona and her glorious song. We’re looking forward to your response.